Edinburghs underground city

 Scotland is, and looks, so old. The buildings here have been left to age and look brown and black which makes them look even older. Maybe it’s the climate, lots of rain. Could be the effects of being on the coast. 

All of it make Scotland feel like you are going back in time. It’s weirdly eerie. I keep wondering what it must be like in winter with mist and fog. 

It feels like a Harry Potter movie here. The building, the old churches. Streets have alleys called closes. They have names like Mary Kings close or the Bishops close. At the end of them are usually houses. They were  usually named after a notable resident.

They were built for security against attack and had gates at the entry. They also allowed for high density housing in the old days. 

There is one that is really interesting. Mary Kings close. Mary was a merchant who lived in the close. The thing is it is this close is underground.

 It lay abandoned for many’s years until two brothers dug it out and now tours are offered. 

In 1644 the plague hit Scotland. Edinburgh’s narrow closes and overcrowded housing was a breeding ground for the disease. Marys close was quarantined. People were taken care of there and given food and water. Many died there. It was abandoned in

It lay crumbing and decaying until it was closed off and things were built on top of it. People still knew about it and managed to get into part of it. 

A man claimed he saw a ghost there. It was a little girl whose family abandoned her and she was looking for a lost doll. He brought a doll down there and it remains there to this day. 

It is known to be haunted and ghosts of people who live there roam the halls.

Beautiful Scotland

 

Scottish insults for shites and giggles

Me and M were laughing yesterday about hearing Scots cuss. Lots of fookin' hells and shites.

So I looked up how to pronounce Scottish curse words and that led me to videos about Scootish insults. Apparently the Scots are among the top insulters in the world. These are some of the tamer ones.

So let's start with words. 

BAWBAG -ball bag (yup it’s what you think) not really offensive apparently -playful

EEJIT - idiot

NUMPTY -idiot

GLAIKIT - stupid

MINK - gross/dirty person

CRABBIT - grumpy

JOBBY - shit

Let’s use some in a sentence shall we? You are a crabbit numpty bawbag.

Here are a few insults: 

SHUT YER SHITEHOLE, YE FANNYBAW

YIV A FACE LIKE A SKELPIT ERSE -you are ugly. Your face looks like someone’s red butt.

SHUT YOUR GEGGIE - shut your mouth

YER BUMS OOT THE WINDAE- talking rubbish.

OAN YER TROLLEY YOU FUCKING WEAPON - get lost, you dangerous arsehole

I’m 5% Scottish and proud of it.

Street performers in Edinburgh

We are staying in Linlithgow. It is actually 20 miles from the center. It takes 20 minutes to get to the center by train. It’s a couple of blocks from the train station and a grocery store. Very convenient. 

So the 2nd day we were here we went to Edinburgh to the jazz festival. Stayed there a while then walked back to central part again and ate at a pizza restaurant because I was getting gnarly.

The street was on a cobbled street that is a pedestrian mall. There was a circle of people gathered around this guy who was yelling. He was a street entertainer.

M wanted to stop so we did. Turns out this guy is an American. He has lived in Scotland for 18 years. It was about a half hour long show. 

When he first started he had a flaming stick in his hand. He had a suitcase with other unlit sticks. You are assuming he juggles fire right? Nope. He uses that as a prop to attract people. That’s not the act.

So he chooses two people from the audience to assist him. Lots of jokes about them. He has laid a chain in a semicircle and the crowd stands behind it. There is a straight jacket on the ground with leather straps. See where this is going?

So he has two guys from the audience put him in the straight jacket and buckle it up. Then he has them take the chain and rap it around him. Then he moves people closer.

He gets out of the chains. Okay that’s done. Now comes the weird part. He tells people who are queasy to look away. He then dislocates one of his shoulders to get out of the straight jacket! 

Being a former ER nurse I knew there were people who had repeated shoulder dislocations. In fact there were people who could do it at will and put it back in. At least once I saw someone come in to try and get narcotics by doing it.

So it’s done and he passed the hat recommending we give him 10 pounds ($12 or so) for the performance knowing he wouldn’t get it. I gave him a few. He worked hard for it.

Bob Dylan on the train to Edinburgh

 Trains are both fun and not fun.. When things go wrong, sudden changes not so fun. We have (by the skin of our teeth) managed to avoid rail strikes. 

We have taken 3 longer train rides so far:  London to Cardiff, Cardiff to Manchester, Manchester to Edinburgh.  

In London you didn’t know the platform number till about 5 minutes before it was scheduled to go. So there was a mad dash for the train like someone was giving away free ice cream. There are no seat assignments so it’s a free for all . 

So Cardiff to Manchester, there is a last minute change of platform. Of course it’s up a staircase, so bag drag. The train is 30 minutes late. Then 4 stops from Manchester there is an announcement that because of a problem with the train, we have to get off at next station and get on another train. 

Manchester to London train was cancelled. Got new tickets for train leaving about two hours later. Of course train change but no problem. Then at some point they announce only four of the eight cars are going on from the next stop. Everybody else had to move up to the cars moving on. Fortunately we were already in car moving forward so no move.

This is where the trip gets interesting. An old guy with a leather  hat comes into the car and finds a seat across from a young couple. He proceeds to tell them his entire life story for the rest of the trip.

He was a musician in a rock group most of his life playing the guitar. They played everywhere around England and had lots of stories of what they got up to. They never really made much money. He has six kids, 9 grandchildren. He is on his way to watch one of his daughters play in a nightclub in Edinburgh. 

After all of that the conversation turns to football (soccer) of course. He is from Brighton (which he hates). He proceeds to talk trash about the womens hometown club Liverpool and the guys hometown club Newcastle.  They talk about Manchester United. He thinks they are overrated and old coach Sir Alex Ferguson (who is revered) was full of himself.

So we’re almost to Edinburgh and they come around to pick up trash and this guy has can after can of beer to throw away. The guy with the trash was amazed. This guy was blotto.

We saw him later on the platform and he had another beer in his hand.  By the way, you can buy booze on the train.

Edinburgh city of hills

 There have been times on this trip when I have thought we should pack it up and go home. Especially on travel days. Sometimes I want to be in my own home, my own bed.

Then something remarkable happens. Like the train trip to Scotland where I see some of the most beautiful scenery I have ever seen.  Beautiful ocean views, rolling hills with cows, sheep and horses. It makes it all worth it.

How can I let some minor inconveniences stop me? It would be insane to miss out on all of this.

So settled in our new airbnb, the best one

 so far. That’s been the hardest part, adjusting to staying at new places. 

Found out today Edinburgh is a city of hills. Seven of them in fact. Experienced a couple of them today . Also lots of old stone stairs.

Today(sat) we went to jazz/blues festival which required going up a long hill, going through a narrow steep walkway with several flights of stairs. I did ok. London s underground got me in shape for it.

The jazz/blues festival was great.

The Scottish coast is stuuning

 It is travel day. We have already begun the fiasco. It's 945 am. We have to leave the airbnb at 10. We get a notification that (WAIT FOR IT!!) the train is cancelled!! So it's only canceled to out train transfer point. So you are thinking get a ticket to the transfer point and continue on your merry way. 

I looked at at later trains  - sold out. I thought I better getter get another train quick with the way this is going. I'm sure it's chaos at the ticket counter. So I booked it thinking I'll get a refund for the first one.

So the new one is at 235 pm. We have a 3 hour wait. We are perched on the 2nd floor of Picadilly looking at people scurrying around.

SCHREEEEECCCHHHHH!!! Stop the blog! I take back whatever I have said about the rail system. This 4.5 hour train was some of the most beautiful scenery I have ever seen. Starting with rolling hills of wheat fields and pastureland with cows, sheep and horses to the beautiful Scottish coastline, it was otherworldly. 

We travelled along the coast for probably an hour and a half of the trip. Gorgeous cliffs and beaches. Pretty coastal towns.

I was thinking what it must be like to live on a big hill with the ocean view on one side and rolling green hills dotted with trees on the other side. A paradise.