I should have bought the $4 beret in Paris

Scenario: Eiffel tower, Paris, 2022. Olivia and the boyfriend are setting up for todays instagram photo. Olivia has on a red beret (or was it a raspberry beret I can't remember). She is wearing a designer dress, cleverly thrifted from T. J. Maxx for just the occasion. There is the inevitably red lipstick. She will be striking one of 3 poses:

1) One leg kicked up, one arm thrust toward the tower

2) Gazing nonchalantly to the side like she sees the eiffel tower every day

3) Both arms up jumping jack fashion in a "look at me at the eiffel tower" pose

Todd the boyfriend looks dishelved and a little peeved.

 May I just say how absolutely, positively, sick and tired I am of instagram posers? Enough already!! Doesn't anybody take a normal bad picture anymore? I have observed them with loathing from one one end of Europe to another.

Stop with the red berets in France,  kicking one leg up in Barcelona, acting like you are cleverly putting your finger on top of some monument!! Stop, before I come over there and slap you silly! 

The  vast majority of the instagrammers are heavily made up young women (in red lipstick) in Vogue inspired outfits,  dragging some poor sap (usually a man) with a camera. Selfie sticks are out these days. These people have professional camera mounts. 

There was one interesting guy with a glittery sombrero and what looked like a bullfighter outfit at the Louvre. They have cement blocks there probably meant for sitting that people stand on and he was standing on one. So that was entertaining.

Paris is probably the worst place for this with all the cliche photo ops. People literally take their lives in their hands in front of the eiffel tower and arc de triompf in the middle of traffic to get the perfect photo or til tok video. 

Then there's me and Mike over here looking like something the cat dragged, in trying trying get an occasional picture together. I wish I had thought to buy us a couple of red berets. What a memorable photo that would have been...

I am an old fart okay? I remember the good old polaroid days when your brother Jimmy's head was cutoff and nobody looked happy at Disneyland. of course the picture was discolored too. Ah...1970s...what a wonderful time...

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November 19, 2022 at 07:52PM